“Here, Tec! You’re miles away!”

“No my fruitful one, I’m thinking. I’m a curious old bean and I’m hearing words on the street that interest me.”

“Whit words, Tec,” said the wistful one?”

“Words like ‘amazing’ and ‘outstanding’ and ‘the best steak in Glasgow’. I think it’s time we investigated.”

I’d heard talk of this place for some weeks now. Not only is it sitting quietly in the well-manicured West End, it is set back from the bustle of Gibson Street, on Otago Street.

Buick parked round the rear – they give you a parking permit if you ask nicely – and that’s an immediate bonus in this neck of the woods.

We pushed back the heavy drapes at the door and sashayed into a very calm, soothing place that instantly.

“How'd you happen to pick out this place?” said Toots

"Maybe I wanted to hold your hand. “

"Oh, that can be arranged,” she said as we were shown to a charming table facing a raw red brick wall peppered with pictures of Glasgow.

“You know, doll, the talk on the street is this place is the greatest a gumshoe could choose for a slab of the finest steak in the city.”

“Oh, Tec. Ah can hardly wait!”

At that moment, mine hostess appeared with an enormous bread board packed with all shapes and sizes of raw meat.

“Do they not even cook it?” inquired the bright one in her traditional stage whisper.

“We do, Ma’am. This is just a tour of what the kitchen can offer.”

It was certainly interesting and my detecting sense swiftly surveyed the cuts on offer including the intriguing tomahawk and a slab of steak that’s been aged for 84 days.

“I’ve been aged for years,” said the Moll. “But you’re looking fine and mature and as swell as ever, my dear”

Her bri-nylon eyelash extensions fluttered dramatically, with as much energy as the breeze from the Whitelee wind farm.

Toots chose the leek and potato soup to start. I went with mussels from Shetland with celeriac, leek in cream sauce and we were both served with crusty bread, in itself delicious.

“Soup’s a lovely comfort on these chilly nights,” said my dearest.

“But it’s mid-July,” I replied.

“Aye, and it’s a Glasgow summer. Wet, windy and cold,” she flashed back at me.

“You look very attractive tonight, Tec,” she said from out of the blue.

“Then I’ll meet you halfway,” I replied as our mains appeared.

We’d both surprisingly shied away from the steaks as perfect as they sounded and selected lamb chops.

They were succulent and seasoned perfectly and sat harmoniously in an enormous plate among a generous selection of rocket and tomatoes.

M’lady chose twice cooked hand cut chunky chips which were a delight writ large.

I went for baby potatoes but didn’t quite expect what I received. They weren’t little balls but instead were sliced and not really what I’d imagined.

“Have a chip, Tec!”

“Have a slice, doll!”

Toots had her lamb well-done. There are only two choices: well-done or pink. I went off-piste to go pink for the night.

We were both pretty well happy with our decisions.

My dining partner’s T-bone lamb was beautifully tender and hit the sky with its well-recommended bone marrow jus to add further depth to the cooking. The sauce alone was a highlight of the night.

My pinky was perky. A change of direction for me, but a delicious one-nighter.

I should have chosen the bone marrow jus. I went instead for the blue cheese sauce just because I’m that kind of guy.

It’s okay with me, usually, but no disrespect to the kitchen, I barely touched it.

“You, okay, Tec?” “Swell, thanks Toots. I’m enjoying the lamb without the sauce.”

“It doesn’t sing to you?” “Well, it sure ain’t an opera.”

Our heaving plates were as packed as nearby Gibson Street – and come to think of it, all but one table in this joint was occupied.

Mine hostess was perfectly charming and always appeared at just the right time. As noted when we first drew back the drapes at the door, Tiffney’s is a sea of calm. A most welcome new kid on the block.

"Pudding, Tec?” “Honey, I’ve had a bucket of the most delicious mussels in an awesome sauce and worked my way through five – count ‘em – five succulent lamb chops.

“And a sack of tatties!”

“Yes, and a fair number of those, you’re right. As ever, my dear”

Tiffney’s Steakhouse

61 Otago Street


G12 6PQ

0141 334 8277


Leek & potato soup £4

Mussels £9

T Bone lamb (two) £38

Onion rings £3


Soda and lime £2.50

Cappuccino £2.50

Double shot Espresso £4




Atmosphere – 4 stars

Food – 3 stars

Service – 4 stars