THE heat was on in the city and it was time for this Tec to lie low.

I was in a bit of a jam with the Feds as I’d been poking my nose into cop business a little too much for their liking.

I thought a bit of distance between me and these mean streets would be a good idea.

“Blondie get your glad rags on we are dining out of town,” I hollered up the stairs at Tec Towers.

As soon as you could say Dolce and Gabbana, Toots was ready. A vision in leopard print and killer heels appeared before me. Faux fur swung over her shoulder and we were off.

I revved up the old Buick and we headed for a swanky little place a few miles out of town called Coast.

Set back off the road in Langbank it was ideal for this ole’ gumshoe.

We pulled in and the car park looked pretty busy. As you can’t book a table at this place for lunch I was just hopeful we would get a seat as I was a little Hank Marvin if you get my drift.

“Oh Tec a window seat would be fabulous – look at this amazing view over the Clyde,” cried Toots. I was saying nothing – I knew the Clyde had more than a few secrets – know what I mean.

We were quickly shown to a table and given a couple of menus.

“I’m in the mood for a little fizz,” The Moll declared as was eyeing up the pink Prosecco – probably to match her nails.

A pint would suit me down to the ground as I had worked up a thirst.

There was certainly plenty staff on – so I could have done with one of them hot-footing it over to take a drinks order. It’s one of my main things – I like to get a drinks order in fast. Finally we were in luck and a cold beer for me and fizz for the lady arrived. Now this menu required a thorough scran scan. It was a bit of an epic. Plenty to chose from no matter what your tastes. I was keeping it simple – fish and chips would do for me.

The Moll after much dithering between a seafood platter and steak – surf or turf – opted for the steak.

That took a while – it was like watching Meg Ryan ordering in When Harry Met Sally.

Toots was opting for medium rare, skinny fries, and a garlic butter sauce on the side.

It was time to sit back relax and soak up the atmosphere.

This joint has had a full makeover of late and it looking good. Coast has a kind of Southern California style to it and plush seating to boot. I think Toots was taken by the soft velour furnishings.

Our mains came promptly out of the kitchen and I couldn’t wait to get stuck in.

Piping hot white flaky fish and fries was just the ticket with garden peas on the side.

Toots’ dinner was some portion. You name it she had it – perfectly cooked steak, onion rings, mushrooms, tomato and fries – she was in her element. Only thing was a barbecue sauce turned up instead of the garlic – but the attentive staff soon had that replaced.

It was a top notch venue with quality food – it was a winner for us.



Sirloin Steak£23.99

Garlic Sauce £2.25

Fish and Chips £12.99


Coffee x 2 £5.40

Pint £4

Prosecco £8.50

Total £57.13


FOOD - ⭐⭐⭐⭐



Coast, Main Road, Langbank, Port Glasgow, 01475 541254