Dear Janice, it’s embarrassing just to admit this, but I think I fancy my priest. I have been going to the same church for the past 35 years and we recently got a new priest.

He moved here from Nigeria in 2019 and he is lovely. I don’t just mean he is good-looking – though he is that – he is genuine, caring and sweet. There are of course more than a few problems with this. But I do think I can lead him away from his holy duties, despite him being around 30 years my junior. Do you think I should try to lead him away from celibacy and into a loving relationship in the real world? Name and address supplied. 

Dear Anonymous, I’m trying to suss out your age in the hope that this is merely a period of menopausal madness on your part!  A few problems? Look, I’m not bewildered by your fascination and fixation for this young man and have no doubt he is very handsome, but apart from being unavailable, celibate, and 30 years younger, he is a PRIEST!  And …’s his job to be kind and caring, so please don’t take his compassionate gestures as any form of personal affection towards you.  

This man already has a loving relationship ….. with GOD, so I doubt anything you had to offer would compare, therefore, I beg you not to humiliate yourself by offering him sex.

He chose to lead a celibate life and carry out duties according to the laws of his God. 
Loneliness is truly under-estimated and can have a huge impact on our wellbeing, and being lonely can lead people to grasp on to unrealistic fantasies and feelings. Get involved with groups of like-minded people and make positive steps to make yourself feel better out with your place of worship. 

Perhaps it is the right time to give your church a break for a while until your emotions and feelings towards this young man subside.  But if church is a big part of your life, it would be a good idea to attend another place of worship where your focus is solely on God, and not his priest!

Dear Janice, my daughter has been seeing a guy from university for almost two years now.  They seem to have a great deal in common and spend a lot of time with each other.  He is very polite and mannerly and treats her well, but comes across as very effeminate (I caught him sewing her hem up), and my gut feeling is that he is gay. Do you think I should confess my thoughts to my daughter before they waste any more time with each other?  Janie.

Dear Janie, absolutely not.  Firstly, you have no grounds for assuming he is gay other than a gut feeling and a little bit of sewing. It’s not a remit for a Savile Row tailor to be gay for goodness sake!

These days men have a regular skin care regime, hug their mates, and sit with their legs crossed, amongst many other things which could be classed as being effeminate, but it’s not a checklist for being gay. Janie, women in general are attracted to masculine men, but others value and appreciate the softer side of their man.   You don’t say if they are having a sexual relationship, but a gay person has no interest in having sex with someone of the opposite sex.

Perhaps he is bi-sexual. Perhaps she is aware of that. Perhaps they are just enjoying each other’s company. And perhaps ….. you should keep your nose out of 
their business.

Dear Janice, I desperately want to have my boobs enlarged but I know my mum will absolutely freak out.  I’ve always been flat chested and am really sensitive and embarrassed about my appearance. There are certain clothes I will never wear as they show my true shape, I hate getting undressed in front of anyone, or go swimming. 

I have dreamt of this for a long time and have been secretly saving to fund this myself, so it’s not like I’m asking my mum for money.

I could get it done and she may not even notice, but if I tell her and she says no then I’ll be gutted.   Danielle.

Dear Danielle, if you had the operation and your mum didn’t notice the change in your body, either she is visually impaired or you have wasted your money.

Let’s face it, you don’t want huge unnatural looking boobs like Katie Price, but there really is not much point in putting yourself through surgery for there not to be a noticeable difference.

From your mum’s perspective, this won’t be about the money, no, it’s about her daughter putting herself through and unnecessary operation. (in her eyes anyway), and the health risks involved.

Best thing you can do is chat to your mum. She may initially go ballistic as you say, but explain how you feel about your body, and the confidence and happiness this procedure could bring to your life.

Do lots of research and find a reputable breast enlargement clinic, make an appointment and take your mum along to meet the consultant and discuss the procedure, recovery time, cost, risks etc. Let her ask as many questions as she needs to put her mind at ease. Good luck.