DEAR Janice, my mum is obsessed with TikTok. Every time I call her she is on it. On the train to work she is on it. Standing in the queue in Tesco she is on it.
We even went out for lunch and she couldn’t put her phone down. On top of that, she repeatedly sends me annoying videos which she thinks are hilarious. I got one the other night at 3am.

I am aware of the downside of watching too much social media and monitor my kids continually, but how can I get my mum to cut back on her viewing hours? It can’t be good for her. Jenna.

Dear Jenna, perhaps Karma is afoot here. I bet your mum had the same issues with you when you were younger. But, I agree wholeheartedly that social media can be damaging, so you are right to monitor your kids usage. As for your mum, well that’s a different matter.

She is an adult and can make her own choices on how she spends her time. I understand your concerns, and agree that adults can get just as addicted to social media as teenagers, but so long as she is not missing out on life. i.e. cancelling time with friends, exercising, and opting out of her usual activities, then I can’t see this is a problem. If her personality and day to day functioning start to change for the worst, then I would intervene. If not, just let her be. Like most fads your mum’s TikTok obsession will fade away.

 

Social media can be a great way of engaging with people, and it has it’s positive side. So, annoying as it is, (especially at 3 in the morning), sending you videos is still a form of communication between you, so tell her you love getting the videos, but during daytime hours would be best.

DEAR Janice, I have fallen in love with my physiotherapist. When he massages me, I tingle from head to toe. He is so masculine and has such strong powerful hands and knows just the right spot to touch. But he is incredibly gentle too.

I feel wonderful physically after each session, but afterwards my mood changes as I know I won’t see him again for a while.

Each session is expensive but I can’t imagine not seeing him again. He is single, so how can I take this further without embarrassing myself? Mags.

Dear Mags, surely there must be a less expensive way to meet the man of your dreams!
Remember, you are paying this physiotherapist for a service, and if he is as good as you say, then you won’t want any awkwardness between you if you say or do the wrong thing.

You seem rather infatuated with this guy without really knowing much about him, but if you are sure he is single then there is no real harm in trying to get to know him better.

At you next appointment, chat and drop him a few hints about places you’d like to go and things you’d like to do.

If he picks up on this, then you’re in with a shout. If he doesn’t, he’s not interested.

DEAR Janice, my wife, the wee soul, has now started back with her driving lessons since restrictions lifted. Great you might say, but I was actually relieved that she was off the road. You see, she is a nightmare driver and I’m secretly praying she doesn’t pass her test for the safety of pedestrians and other drivers, (and herself of course).

She is 67 years old and this is her seventh attempt, and although I hate to say it, she is bloody useless, and in my opinion has no hope of passing.
Years back, I took her out a couple of times and she almost mowed down an elderly man who stepped off the kerb, and then she drove up a one way street!

I’m honestly not trying to be derogatory, just realistic and recognise that some people should never be allowed behind a steering wheel. On top of the worry this all brings, the whole process is costing us a fortune.

Despite many years of failure, she is still determined to pass her test. How do I convince her to just pack it in? Davie.

Dear Davie, I really admire your wife for her perseverance. Especially after a lockdown gap year with no lessons. I would have thrown in the towel, for sure.

Her driving might not be as bad as you have experienced in the past, and they say you only really learn to drive when you pass your test, so there is hope. For some people nerves go to pot on test days which can jeopardise their chance of passing, however, if you are concerned for her safety, (and that of others), perhaps it would be a good idea to speak in confidence to her driving instructor who will have a realistic idea of her driving ability (or lack of it). Ask him what the probability is of her passing. 

Glasgow Times: Image for Driving Lessons Winchester

Unless her instructor also finds her a hazard on the road, rather than knock her confidence and enthusiasm, I’m afraid I would let her continue. And you never know Davie, at this snail’s pace of endurance, perhaps eventually her eyesight will fail enough to render her exempt! Good luck.