Dear Janice, my darling wife died four years ago and I loved her dearly, so never imagined I could be happy again. But, months back I met a lovely lady and we now spend a lot of time together. 

We have just returned from a week in the Lake District, and it’s been wonderful. However, since my wife passed away I visited her grave religiously every week just to sit and chat to her and tell her how much I miss her. The problem is that now I am enjoying myself with my new partner, I have less and less time to visit my wife’s grave and the enormous guilt I feel is overwhelming at times. I feel like I have abandoned her. On the other hand, how can I refuse to go places with my new partner for the sake of a visit to the graveyard? She is understanding, but I think that would be pushing it. Also, following a long period of nursing my wife prior to her passing, I love the new freedom I now have, but how do I overcome this guilt? Arthur.

Dear Arthur, I do feel for you. You don’t need me to tell you how lucky you are to have had such a wonderful loving relationship, and again you are blessed with another partner to move forward in life with. And move forward you must.
We all have our personal reasons for visiting (or not visiting) the resting place of a loved one. We like to show respect and remember them, and it can also be a quiet time to focus and reflect on our own lives, but we shouldn’t feel guilty for not being there on a regular basis.

I’m not sure how religious you are, but there is nothing in the Bible that requires us to visit the resting place of a loved one. We do it because we feel a need, and I’m sure you will visit on special occasions like your wife’s passing, her birthday etc.
Arthur remember, regardless of where you are on this earth, or who you are with, you can take timeout and ‘chat’ to your beloved wife and recall the happy memories you shared without being by her graveside. Good luck with your future.

Dear Jenny, I sympathise. The last thing you want to do is create tension between you and your daughter, but how can you stand by and watch your grandchildren’s health deteriorate?
Praise her for doing such a great job, as it can’t be easy coping on her own. There are two main issues here. The amount of unhealthy food they are consuming, and the lack of exercise. Perhaps, you could batch cook for them. This would alleviate some pressure for your daughter and also ensure they have nourishing meals with relevant portion sizes at least a few times a week.
Encourage them all to get involved in after school activities, adventure walks, swimming, and cycling. Help out in ferrying them about if necessary.
But the heart of this problem is educating your daughter. She needs to be a good role model, and be aware that this lifestyle can only bring unhappiness and future health risks for her children, who I have no doubt will be very conscious of their weight gain.
These days people are so busy, it’s quicker to order fast food or shove a pizza in the oven, and she probably has no clue where to begin. So, help educate her with basic nutrition and how to shop. Check out Obesity UK for more advice.

Dear Janice, I am finally in a job I really enjoy. My colleagues are fun, and we have a work social life too. All in all, everything is great except for one thing. 
My female boss is coming on to me and I don’t know how to handle the situation. Don’t get me wrong, she is very attractive, but she is also married. I’ve been told she lives a single life (whatever that really means), but she is still my boss. We have a work night out soon, and I’m wondering if I should give it a miss in case I do something I’ll regret. Stephen.

Dear Stephen, giving it a miss is a wise decision until you know more about this potential femme fatal. Firstly, you must confirm whether she is married. 
If she is, don’t go there. If not, then it could the start of something between you. But… if it didn’t go well, who do you think would feel the most vulnerable at work after your fling?
It would be a real shame to lose a job you love, or have to move to another one over someone you barely know. Think with you head and not your…….