Dear Janice, more than one person has said they’ve heard my wife is having an affair with a colleague. But I don’t believe any of it. However, it was niggling me so I tested her reaction when she was heading out the other night by saying “hi you look great, hope you’ve not got another man tucked away somewhere?” She just laughed, cuddled me, and said I was more than enough for her.

She is very loving and we still have good sex, so that’s why I don’t believe these rumours, and surely she couldn’t be putting on an act like this with me whilst seeing someone else? But now I have these niggles every time she is at work or out for a few drinks.

I have met a few of her male colleagues and I don’t think they would entertain the idea of having an affair with my wife. That said, I now worry. How can I get to the bottom of this one way or another?



Dear Tom, there really is no simple answer to this, because unless you catch your wife in bed with someone, it’s a guessing game until you have some other concrete evidence.  

It’s not for me to decide if she is a loyal and loving wife, or if she is a contender for an Academy Award.

People say there is no smoke without fire, and I never go on gossip alone, but it is a bit telling that more than one person seems to think that your wife is being unfaithful.  

There is little point in asking her outright because if she is innocent she’ll be upset and annoyed, and if she is guilty she won’t admit it unless she wants to leave you.

Are you ready for that possibility? Tom you can either choose to ignore these rumours and wait to see if something crops up that proves her infidelity, or you can begin to delve more deeply into your wife’s life in the hope of uncovering the truth. Trust me though, either way is not a pleasant way to live.

I’ll keep my fingers crossed that your wife is all you need her to be and not the recipient of an Oscar.

Dear Janice, our daughter is nearly 23 stone and it breaks our heart to see her deteriorate right in front of our eyes.

She is in her late twenties and has never left home. 

She has been on every imaginable diet which starts with good intentions, but after a short time she gives up and phones a takeaway and the downward cycle begins.

Admittedly we pander to her a little because she is our only child and we hate to see her unhappy, so we tend to give in to her demands. Me and her mother have never had an issue with food or weight so don’t really know how to help her without making her miserable.



Dear Jack, you and your wife are right to be concerned because obesity is a killer! 

Firstly your daughter should visit her GP who can refer her to a dietitian as she desperately needs a proper controlled diet with a health and exercise plan in place. 

It is also essential that you are both educated in these matters too. This will help you help your daughter and hopefully deter you from facilitating her overeating and poor diet.

Difficult as it will be, this is a case of being cruel to be kind so you both need to be strong for her. 

Overeating is rarely about the enjoyment of food. There are many reasons why people find themselves in this rather bleak situation and your daughter needs professional help to get to the bottom of her deep-rooted issues so that she can break this unhappy and dangerous lifestyle.

With your help, she should start to see positive changes in her life and hopefully become the independent and healthy young woman you hope for. 


Dear Janice, I’m turning 60 this year and I am still on the shelf. I have had relationships but never been married and it looks like I never will.

I spent many years looking after my parents and now I find that I have no social life so have little to add to any conversation.  

I am not well paid so don’t have a lot of money for fancy nights out and clothes etc.
It seems like everyone’s life is moving on, and I am in the same position as I was 30 years ago – only older looking. Any advice would help.



Dear Jean, on reading your extended email it’s obvious you are lonely, but there is no magic way of fulfilling your emptiness.

Only you can change your outcome, so you need to put a plan in place.

There are many activities and groups you can join which cost nothing. Volunteering is a great way to help others, socialise and make new friends. 

As for conversation, most people are happy to talk about themselves, so let them natter away until you gain enough confidence to join in.

Trust me, marriage and happiness are not necessarily always connected so change your focus to looking after number one – you. 

Move on from your past and get yourself out in the land of the living.  

When you do, everything will improve.