Dear Janice,

My fiancée is not the love of my life, but there is no chance of getting back with my ex whom I adored as she ended our relationship and has since married.

I’m trying to move on with my fiancée in the hope that my ex will become a distant memory because I think about her constantly.

My fiancée is wonderful, my parents love her, and she would be a superb mother, so why isn’t she in my thoughts more than my ex who only had to walk into a room and I was on fire.

I don’t get that same ‘buzz’ with my fiancée either.

We have started to look at wedding venues etc and it’s all getting very real, but I’m confused.



Dear Robert,

It should have gotten very ‘real’ the instant you put a ring on this poor girl’s finger.

Moving on with your fiancée is essential, but you should marry her because you love and adore her, not because you selfishly need to get over your ex.

You have the chance to be with a wonderful, maternal, loving, and loyal lady who deserves similar qualities from someone in return.

If you can’t be that person, then walk away.

Keep in mind, your ex dumped you and ‘buzzed’ off with someone else, and I very much doubt she gives you a passing thought. If you don’t put your thoughts and efforts into your fiancée and your future together, you may wake up to discover she too has dumped you. And who could blamer her?


Dear Janice,

My dad left my mum and me when I was nine. He has since remarried and had two more children.

I get on OK with

my stepfamily but whenever I visit, my dad constantly picks on me, puts me down, and treats me like a child in front of everyone.

As a result, I rarely visit and tend to catch up with my wee brothers when our dad is not about.

I’ve heard that my step-mum thinks

I’m being childish,

(even though I’m 19),

but despite the fact that I miss my dad, I have had enough.



Dear Ruby,

It is a pity that you feel the need to distance yourself from your dad because I have no doubt, he loves you and likely still sees you as his little girl.

But it doesn’t give him the right to verbally abuse you in front of others.

Generally, when one person gets picked on, it’s because they are the easiest target, and I imagine his put-downs are when you are in company and not alone together.

You’re nineteen, so invite your dad to the pub and have an honest chat.

Be strong. Tell him you love him but you’ve had enough, and ask that he considers how he makes you feel or you’ll continue to stay away. I reckon this will be all it takes for him to button it.