Dear Janice, I can’t find the courage to dump my boyfriend of five years.  

We live together and have a dog, so it feels like splitting up a family.

He is an all-round lovely, kind guy, and I know I’ll be the bad guy, but I don’t have any passion or love for him anymore.

Another month has passed, and I haven’t found the words to tell him how I feel, so how do I approach the subject?

He wants us to book a holiday and I’m running out of reasons not to go.

The longer we are together, the more I long to be free, but I still put up with him and carry on as normal. Tracey.

Dear Tracey, sounds like he is putting up with you too!

Do you honestly think he has no clue that the woman he loves is drifting away from him?

Being with someone purely because they are lovely, nice and safe is like dripping water on the last spark of fire you have in your soul, therefore, this relationship needs to come to an end.

You seem beyond couples counselling which only works if both parties are invested in the relationship, and you’re not, so next time he mentions a holiday, explain clearly that you do not want to go because you see no future for you as a couple.

It might not be what he wants to hear but dragging this out is death by a thousand cuts for both of you.


Dear Janice, recently I’ve noticed my friend has been forgetting things.  

Not just items of shopping or arrangements we have made, but bigger things.

For example, she called me to say she parked her car in the town centre and couldn’t find it again. Soon after we were chatting about a family occasion, and she couldn’t remember my son’s name, even though we have been friends for 40 years.

My daughter says we all forget things and it’s normal, but should I be worried? SH.

Dear SH, we do all forget things now and again, especially if we have a busy job, family to look after and a to-do list as long as your arm.

As we get older, we are not as sharp at recall as we once were, however, age related memory loss doesn’t usually cause major disruptions to our life.

If this is happening frequently, it certainly could be a cause for concern. Does she ask the same questions over and over, forget common words, struggle to complete simple tasks or get lost in familiar places?

There are many reasons why this can happen and sometimes problems can be reversed, but the only way forward is to seek medical advice, especially if your friend has a family history of memory problems.

Don’t alarm her, instead reassure her that she is not alone and that you wouldn’t be a good friend if you didn’t encourage her to investigate her issues. 


Got a question for our agony aunt? Email